Carlen’s Testimony

I have shared this testimony before but had the feeling this morning that someone needs to hear it here. I hope my testimony will help others.

Years ago, I had gotten my daughter two out of the three of the Gardasil vaccine. For those who don't know what this is, it is a vaccine that is supposed to prevent cervical cancer and HPV.

Being a cautious mother and thinking I was doing the right thing, I took her to get the shot. Little did I know that it would be one of the worst decisions I would have ever made.

The side effects were to no avail horrible. Temporary paralysis in her legs, talked as if she had, had a stroke, hair loss, homebound for a year and a half of school, muscle and joint pain, the list goes on. I am telling you this because you see, I carried around the guilt, and it was killing me on the inside. I was doing all I knew how to do to get her better.

At the time, I didn't know the Lord like I do now. I went with a friend to a church conference. During the meeting, I was hit with all the guilt I was carrying and was crying. I was approached by a man that didn't know me, and he asked me, "how's it working for ya, getting kinda heavy to carry around?" I tried to explain what I was going through, but he didn't want to hear it. He said, "God knows, and He is ready to take it from you if you want to give it to Him." As I stood there, my emotions began to overtake me. The thoughts ran through my head. "Well, I caused her to be this way; it's not His responsibility. Though it would be nice not to have to carry this burden anymore."

Still thinking all of this. The man said, here is a kleenex box. This tissue represents your daughter. My hand represents God's altar. When you are ready, take her out and place her at God's altar. I was overwhelmed with what to do, and he spoke these words. "But just know when you place her there, you can't take her back."

As I stood there and balled like a 5-year-old, tears flowing down my face and the hurt that I had endeavored from what she had to go through, I pulled her out, held her, and then decided to lay her at God's altar. It was incredible the release I felt at that moment. I began to see how God does want us to surrender all to Him.

I tell you this testimony today, hoping that whatever you are carrying around and thinking that you can fix, you can't. Only He can!!!

God was with my daughter the whole time and gave her the strength to keep pressing on. When I look at her, I am delighted as to the woman that she has become, and I am ever so grateful that I gave her to Him. Through my journey, I know nothing is too big for God. Be quick to give it to Him and lean on Him for understanding.